Who's got a good joke I can use tonight

[JWags85]

It would be funny if he wasn't polling at 46%

I don't know if there is a more representative picture of the absurdity of American politics recently than Georgia.

It used to be fairly normal.  You go back 20ish years and you have Zell Miller as a governor/senator who was extremely down the middle and bipartisan.  Then you look at this seat, where Isakson used to be, for a Republican he was moderately balanced. 

He get sick, steps down and you get Loeffler who stunk, Warnock who was just a guy with a D next to his name, and now he's vulnerable to a complete buffon who decided getting bashed in the head playing football wasn't enough so he decided to dabble in MMA after the NFL and whose most prominent post-football accomplishment is lying about his business endeavors

[Lighthouse 84]

"Since we don't control the air, our good air decided to float over to China's bad air. So when China gets our good air, their bad air got to move. So it moves over to our good air space. Then -- now we got we to clean that back up."
- Herschel Walker

FFS.  What you posted isn't even a joke.  Instead it looks like someone's trying to change the title of the thread to:

Who's got a good thread we can turn political?

[Spotcheck Billy]

FFS.  What you posted isn't even a joke.  Instead it looks like someone's trying to change the title of the thread to:

Who's got a good thread we can turn political?

Not even close, how many political posts do I make here?

[Billy Hoyle]

What's the best thing about Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus.

[JWags85]

I was watching Bluey with my niece the other day (which is an incredibly written show BTW, so many great adult jokes woven in with a cute kid's show).  One scene had just a perfect joke line...

"Thats what happens when you're unhappy with what you've got...somebody's husband ends up hurt"

[Lighthouse 84]

Not even close, how many political posts do I make here?

Ooh, call on me Alex.  What is, at least one?

[Scoop Snoop]

Old TV show:

On Cheers, the customers were enjoying watching the swimsuit competition part of the Miss America contest on the TV while Diane ranted about how sexist the swimsuit contest was. Woody, the Indiana farm boy turned bartender, is washing glasses when Norm says "Hey Woody. Miss Indiana!" Woody smiles and replies, "Oh, I did at first Mr. Peterson, but Boston's my home now."

[Jockey]

  Ooh, call on me Alex.  What is, at least one?

Wow. Triggered a bit easily?

Man up.

[Pakuni]

Did you hear the one about gaslighting?
<No>
Yes, you did.

[JWags85]

Old TV show:

On Cheers, the customers were enjoying watching the swimsuit competition part of the Miss America contest on the TV while Diane ranted about how sexist the swimsuit contest was. Woody, the Indiana farm boy turned bartender, is washing glasses when Norm says "Hey Woody. Miss Indiana!" Woody smiles and replies, "Oh, I did at first Mr. Peterson, but Boston's my home now."

My parents used to live in Indy and their best friends back then went to Hanover College with Woody.  They said while he wasn't a moron, personality wise, he wasn't doing too much acting on Cheers

[Scoop Snoop]

My parents used to live in Indy and their best friends back then went to Hanover College with Woody.  They said while he wasn't a moron, personality wise, he wasn't doing too much acting on Cheers

I've heard that before! Another classic line from a TV show is Danny on Bluebloods. He tried to get a defense attorney to help him out a little on a case and the attorney refused. Danny stormed off and blurted to his partner "He went to the same law school my sister went to. Ball Buster U.!"

[StillAWarrior]

My parents used to live in Indy and their best friends back then went to Hanover College with Woody.  They said while he wasn't a moron, personality wise, he wasn't doing too much acting on Cheers

I loved the video where Woody realized -- mid-interview -- that Liam and Chris Hemsworth were brothers.

[rocket surgeon]

I don't know if there is a more representative picture of the absurdity of American politics recently than Georgia.

It used to be fairly normal.  You go back 20ish years and you have Zell Miller as a governor/senator who was extremely down the middle and bipartisan.  Then you look at this seat, where Isakson used to be, for a Republican he was moderately balanced. 

He get sick, steps down and you get Loeffler who stunk, Warnock who was just a guy with a D next to his name, and now he's vulnerable to a complete buffon who decided getting bashed in the head playing football wasn't enough so he decided to dabble in MMA after the NFL and whose most prominent post-football accomplishment is lying about his business endeavors

   still better than a guy who showered with his daughter and calls his drug addict son the smartest guy he knows, but never talks to him about his CCP endeavors.  not to mention he doesn't know when to sit, where to sit and how to read...

[Uncle Rico]

   still better than a guy who showered with his daughter and calls his drug addict son the smartest guy he knows, but never talks to him about his CCP endeavors.  not to mention he doesn't know when to sit, where to sit and how to read...

3 of 10

[Jockey]

3 of 10

Apparently our resident snowflake is not bothered at all by roqqet's mindless ranting.

Comment on Lighthouse. I thought these post triggered you.

[Lighthouse 84]

Apparently our resident snowflake is not bothered at all by roqqet's mindless ranting.

Comment on Lighthouse. I thought these post triggered you.

I'll be happy to comment and it's the same as it was about the last one. Why does an innocent thread about a good joke to use have to turn into political BS? Some people can't help themselves. Just like you can't help but be a colossal a$$wipe.

[tower912]

Oh, pot.  The things you say about kettle.

[Dickthedribbler]

So, a Hillbilly and his 13 year old daughter walk into town one day to visit the local doctor:

Hillbilly: Doc, I'd like you to give my daughter
              some of them there pills so she don't
              get pregnant?

Doctor: Is your daughter sexually active?

Hillbilly: Nah, she pretty much just lays there
              like her ma.

[Hards Alumni]

   still better than a guy who showered with his daughter and calls his drug addict son the smartest guy he knows, but never talks to him about his CCP endeavors.  not to mention he doesn't know when to sit, where to sit and how to read...

Find a hobby.

[warriorchick]

Old TV show:

On Cheers, the customers were enjoying watching the swimsuit competition part of the Miss America contest on the TV while Diane ranted about how sexist the swimsuit contest was. Woody, the Indiana farm boy turned bartender, is washing glasses when Norm says "Hey Woody. Miss Indiana!" Woody smiles and replies, "Oh, I did at first Mr. Peterson, but Boston's my home now."

Sam:  That guy didn't pass muster.

Woody:  Maybe he couldn't reach it.

[MU82]

My parents used to live in Indy and their best friends back then went to Hanover College with Woody.  They said while he wasn't a moron, personality wise, he wasn't doing too much acting on Cheers

I actually have been surprised at how good an actor Harrelson has become.

He was great in True Detective, really good in Three Billboards, an outstanding villain in the 807th Planet of the Apes remake, etc.

He's not gonna make anybody forget Hanks or Crowe, but he's done A-OK for a guy who I at first thought couldn't act his way out of a paper bag on Cheers.

[PGsHeroes32]

I actually have been surprised at how good an actor Harrelson has become.

He was great in True Detective, really good in Three Billboards, an outstanding villain in the 807th Planet of the Apes remake, etc.

He's not gonna make anybody forget Hanks or Crowe, but he's done A-OK for a guy who I at first thought couldn't act his way out of a paper bag on Cheers.

Guy has 3 oscar noms among his many many great roles.

Woody can definitely act.

[lawdog77]

Guy has 3 oscar noms among his many many great roles.

Woody can definitely act.

5 Emmy Nominations too. And some MTV Awards for best kiss.

[pbiflyer]

My parents used to live in Indy and their best friends back then went to Hanover College with Woody.  They said while he wasn't a moron, personality wise, he wasn't doing too much acting on Cheers

Back in the late 80s I lived down the street from Woody. His roommate used to sell round beach towels in Venice Beach. (Round so you wouldn't have to move them as the sun moved, genius, I know. Can't believe they didn't catch on!)
The couple times I ran into him, he seemed genuinely nice. His roommate at the time was what you would expect from a guy selling round beach towels.

[Jables1604]

I actually have been surprised at how good an actor Harrelson has become.

He was great in True Detective, really good in Three Billboards, an outstanding villain in the 807th Planet of the Apes remake, etc.

He's not gonna make anybody forget Hanks or Crowe, but he's done A-OK for a guy who I at first thought couldn't act his way out of a paper bag on Cheers.

He had a phenomenal cameo in the most recent season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. You can tell he doesn't take himself too seriously.