Dad jokes

[Not A Serious Person]

Legit story…


Archaeology students found dad jokes from Ancient Rome
https://www.npr.org/2023/04/01/1167432458/archaeology-students-found-dad-jokes-from-ancient-rome

[tower912]

My son plays the trombone and bass and therefore learned to read all of the bass notes.   He is in a musical this year and it turns out he is a tenor.   He is struggling to learn the treble notes.   Will he figure it out in time?  Tune in next week to find out!

This is called a clef hanger.

It's a little known fact, Normie, that the notes are different.

That is a clef Claven

[tower912]

What Christmas Carol do they play on a mental ward?



Do you hear what I hear?

[muwarrior69]

What Christmas Carol do they play on a mental ward?



Do you hear what I hear?

...and, do you see what I see.


Rocket Surgeon's favorite hymn has to be:

Drum role, Crown Him with many Crowns.

[tower912]

What is the title of the physician who has to be available for any and all extreme emergencies over the weekend?


The on-call-ogist.

[tower912]

My daughter's dog got infested with little biting insects while visiting her future in-laws over the holiday.  (true!)   Driving back to Baltimore from SC, they stopped by the side of the road so the dog could get out and have a really good scratch.

So she got fleas pullovers for Christmas.

[Scoop Snoop]

My father always said that when one door closes, another opens. He was a wise man.... but a terrible cabinetmaker.

[tower912]

He who lives by the tort dies by the tort.
Or....
He lives by the torte dies by the torte.

[tower912]

In Saudi Arabia, one of the lesser princes is in charge of all of the charcuterie platters.



He is the tray sheik.

[Lennys Tap]

In Saudi Arabia, one of the lesser princes is in charge of all of the charcuterie platters.



He is the tray sheik.

Studied under Sheik Yer Booti

[tower912]

If Herman Melville were alive today and writing about scoop, he would only have to change his titles slightly.

Typo
O-MU
Mopey Dick

[tower912]

When it comes to making tea properly,

There is a steep learning curve.

[pbiflyer]

You know, not everyone thinks of Cleopatra as beautiful.

But that's how Julius Caesar.

[tower912]

With open house/graduation season upon us, many will be reaching out to neighbors to see who has additional place settings, Tupperware, cutlery, etc.   Get it in writing.

Call it an extra dish-n treaty.

[Scoop Snoop]

My neighbor asked me if I could give him a reference to a good septic cleaning company. I did so. Then he made the mistake of asking if we were happy with the work. Yes...really!

I texted that we were very happy with his service. I said he did a really crappy job, which was just what we wanted. I also said that we were the second job that day, so we were #2 on his list. Lastly, I added that the man was flushed with pride in a job well done.