Dilemma ... A little help?

[4everwarriors]

LXXXII,
Man, you fooked dis up major already. Ya gotta cum clean. Tell'm ya got your schmeckel snipped on da ate dey, married a Catholic, and y'all are just kumbain' to da beet of a different drumma. Honesty is yo best choice, dude, ai na?

[dgies9156]

MU 82:

You are in Charlotte, so the question is whether the neighbors are long-termers and subscribers to a fundamentalist Christian sect common to the Southeast? It's been awhile since I lived in the south, but I tended to see more of this there than in the Midwest, for example.

I'd suggest a couple of answers:

1) Is this a common custom in your neighborhood? If so, you may be swimming upstream.
2) How important is "going along to getting along" in your neighborhood? If it's a Big Deal, you may want to choose Door Number 1 to avoid being the neighborhood pariah.

I don't know how important your neighborhood relations overall might be, but in our community we're careful. We tend to avoid politics, for example, because it's a volatile issue and we don't always think the way our neighbors do. Sometimes you just have to look beyond the slights that others post.

[ZiggysFryBoy]

Cut down the fuggin' tree and throw it in her yard.

[ZiggysFryBoy]

Or buy them a freedom from religion foundation membership for the year.

[TAMU, Knower of Ball]

So I googled "Neighbors decorated my tree" to see if this was a common occurrence because I was genuinely curious. It doesn't seem to be...but I found this in one of the first couple of links



Is this your tree 82?

[Dr. Blackheart]

Is this a Carolina Panther thing?  #keeppounding

https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/nfl/superbowl/2016/01/30/neighbors-decorate-coach-riveras-yard/79567476/

[Jockey]

MU82

I would live it with it and maybe mention it in passing down the road. The gesture was nice and why make her feel badly.

Mike, I agree with Merritt and Goose.

It would be the same in my household if the same situation arose and my wife would be giving the same advice as yours. She is Buddhist, but does not object to celebrating Christmas.

Since it is sports-themed, I don't think it needs to be called out to a neighbor.

[21Jumpstreet]

Honesty and kindness, two things done together that never go out of style.

[reinko]

So I googled "Neighbors decorated my tree" to see if this was a common occurrence because I was genuinely curious. It doesn't seem to be...but I found this in one of the first couple of links



Is this your tree 82?

It looks like if an alien is ummm, ya know...

[Jay Bee]

Tell 'em to lick ur matzo ballz

C'mon man.. is this really a topic?

[GooooMarquette]

I'd just go out in the dark of night, pull 'em all down and trash 'em...and then tell the neighbor that you heard a racket in the yard in the middle of the night.

[Jay Bee]

Must be something about you that would make ppl think it's cool to decorate your yard. Y'all swinging over there or what?

[naginiF]

Must be something about you that would make ppl think it's cool to decorate your yard. Y'all swinging over there or what?

I've never heard the phrase "swinging christian" before but i like it.  It's anyone that professes to be christian but is openly hostile to 'others' right?

[rocket surgeon]

        give 'em another C-note to take 'em off    or start off every morning walkin out to get the charlotte observer in your tighty whitey's pulled into an atomic wedgie-you'll see a for sale sign faster than chester the molester's first happy ending watching the baywatch intro

[Benny B]

Is this a Carolina Panther thing?  #keeppounding

https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/nfl/superbowl/2016/01/30/neighbors-decorate-coach-riveras-yard/79567476/

Considering 60-ish and eccentric, I could see how one might mistake 82 for a professional athlete if you added senile and legally blind to the neighbors' description.

[MU82]

Here's what we decided ...

I decided to let my wife take the lead. She is more sensitive about our atheism and about being potentially ostracized.

She thinks that Debi will be embarrassed that she assumed we were Christian. She thinks that as long as we handle it well, she will gladly remove the ornaments and there will be no backlash whatsoever.

Rather than approach them in person - which would elicit an immediate, face-to-face reaction - my wife is going to write Debi a nice text in the morning. She is going to politely explain that we are not religious people and that we are uncomfortable having Christmas ornaments on our tree, but she is going to make sure she says how much we like having them as our neighbors and that we know it was a gesture of kindness on their part.

This seems the right course of action to me, too.

[GGGG]

Here's what we decided ...

I decided to let my wife take the lead. She is more sensitive about our atheism and about being potentially ostracized.

She thinks that Debi will be embarrassed that she assumed we were Christian. She thinks that as long as we handle it well, she will gladly remove the ornaments and there will be no backlash whatsoever.

Rather than approach them in person - which would elicit an immediate, face-to-face reaction - my wife is going to write Debi a nice text in the morning. She is going to politely explain that we are not religious people and that we are uncomfortable having Christmas ornaments on our tree, but she is going to make sure she says how much we like having them as our neighbors and that we know it was a gesture of kindness on their part.

This seems the right course of action to me, too.

Scene from 82's neighborhood tomorrow...

[MU82]

Scene from 82's neighborhood tomorrow...

Well, at least it's not a burning cross.

[Jay Bee]

Here's what we decided ...

I decided to let my wife take the lead. She is more sensitive about our atheism and about being potentially ostracized.

She thinks that Debi will be embarrassed that she assumed we were Christian. She thinks that as long as we handle it well, she will gladly remove the ornaments and there will be no backlash whatsoever.

Rather than approach them in person - which would elicit an immediate, face-to-face reaction - my wife is going to write Debi a nice text in the morning. She is going to politely explain that we are not religious people and that we are uncomfortable having Christmas ornaments on our tree, but she is going to make sure she says how much we like having them as our neighbors and that we know it was a gesture of kindness on their part.

This seems the right course of action to me, too.

Over-sensitive pansies, IMO

[Eldon]

Here's what we decided ...

I decided to let my wife take the lead. She is more sensitive about our atheism and about being potentially ostracized.

She thinks that Debi will be embarrassed that she assumed we were Christian. She thinks that as long as we handle it well, she will gladly remove the ornaments and there will be no backlash whatsoever.

Rather than approach them in person - which would elicit an immediate, face-to-face reaction - my wife is going to write Debi a nice text in the morning. She is going to politely explain that we are not religious people and that we are uncomfortable having Christmas ornaments on our tree, but she is going to make sure she says how much we like having them as our neighbors and that we know it was a gesture of kindness on their part.

This seems the right course of action to me, too.

Did she though?  As someone mentioned above, Christmas--especially in the US--is almost a national holiday rather than a religious one.  I mean, look at Halloween.  Does anyone who "celebrates" Halloween actually care about its origins?

Take a look at the decadent Christmas lights in Japan, a country that loves Christmas but is apathetic about Christianity:

https://www.accessible-japan.com/christmas-lights-japan/

[MU82]

Did she though?

Well, assuming we stay friendly enough with them to have casual conversations, we eventually might find out what she thought our religious affiliation was.

As for one of your earlier posts ... I already had said I am not an in-your-face atheist. If I were, I'd already have handled this and I certainly wouldn't have reached out to my Scoop friends for their take.

[MU82]

Over-sensitive pansies, IMO

Skol, Panthers, IMO

[Herman Cain]

 I think your neighbors are just being festive and from all accounts you get along with them. Life has all sorts of twists and turns and keeping good neighbor relations is a good asset. So if it was up to me I would just let it go. Then deal with it in advance next year. Let your wife handle that discussion.

[forgetful]

Probably a little late.  But one route would be to thank them for the decorations, and mention that it was very kind of them to go with a sports theme as you are not religious and would usually not want any Christmas themed decorations.

It would simultaneously thank them, make it seem like they were being thoughtful of your religious stance (even though they were actually unaware), but also let them know where you stand so there are not issues down the road. 

[rocket surgeon]

if you've ever watched ID tv, they have a whole slew of episodes on stuff like this-it's called "fear thy neighbor".  after watching a few of those, i think you might be better off smiling and trying to make light of it or getting yourself a couple of guns