Author Topic: First Annual 2009 Milwaukee Tournament of the Suck (Read 7066 times)

Ari Gold · « **on:** March 19, 2009, 12:42:19 PM »

The General and I came up with a 65 "team" tournament of things that suck in/about Milwaukee. It is similiar to a Chicago sports radio version http://imgsrv.670thescore.com/image/wscr2/UserFiles/File/TOB(3).jpg however it is much more Milwaukee Area centric. Of course there is some debate over who got in and who was left out, but overall we felt like these are the 65 worst things about the Milwaukee Area. My only request is that you don't actually take this seriously enough to get offended. The General and I thought we were rather nonpartisian and truthful about our selections. Here is the break down by region (my apologies that its directly in the post. I haven't been able to make a printable jpg of the bracket yet:

The Milwaukee Public School Region
1) Milwaukee Bonecrushers

16) Marquette Tribune/UWM Post (Play-in)

8) The Milwaukee Mile

9) West Allis

4) The Lake Smell

13) Timmermann Airport

5) Juneteenth Day Violence

12) The Red Bucks' Uniforms

3) Alcohol-Free Jazz In the Park

14) The Milwaukee Theater

6) Northwest Airlines

11) Crusiers on Lincoln Memorial Drive

7) The Shops of Grand Avenue

10) People Who Still Make Jokes About Marquette Gold

2) The US Bank Championship

15) Marquette Radio's Frequency

The Michael McGee Sr. Region
1) Milwaukee Journel-Sentinel

16) WSSP Sports Talk

8) Mark Belling's Self-Righteous Rants

9) Steve "The Homer" True

4) Bill Michaels

13) The Channel 10/36 Auction

5) CBS 58

12) Eugene Kane

3) Storm Team 4

14) Charlie Sykes' Commericals

6) Shephard Express

11) Dirty Dining with Courtney Gerish

7) Jeff Wagner's Monotone Voice

10) WMLW

2) 94.5 Lake FM

15) WTMJ-TV Live at 3

The Water Street Regional
1) Art's Performance Center

16) Rickey's on State

8) Lucille's Post Renovation

9) Grant's Pub

4) Paying a Cover Charge in Milwaukee

13) Victor's

5) Hookah Bars

12) The Third Ward

3) Bootleggers

14) Bars That Sell Bud Light

6) Caffiene-Free Sparks

11) Leinie's Fireside Nut

7) 9 PM Alcohol Sales Cutoff

10) Suite

2) The Annex

15) Judge's Irish Pub

The MMSD Regional

1) Gwen Moore

16) Lena Taylor

8) Mandatory Sick Days

9) Bob Bauman

5) Ned Yost

12) Arab World Festival

4) Riversplash

13) 50 MPH Speed Limits

3) Tom Crean's Big Man Recruiting

14) UWM Basketball

6) Scott Walker Saying "Hold the Line"

11) Charlene Hardin

7) Milwaukee County Buses

10) Tom Barrett's Choo-Choo Train

2) Michael McGee

15) Bob Donovan

LON · « **Reply #1 on:** March 19, 2009, 12:59:09 PM »

Haha, Grant's Pub...

Skatastrophy · « **Reply #2 on:** March 19, 2009, 01:04:38 PM »

Quote from: Ari Gold on March 19, 2009, 12:42:19 PM

3) Alcohol-Free Jazz In the Park

Jazz in the Park has always been "alcohol free" because of the cities' open container law. Even the MKE police chief has commented that Jazz in the Park public drinking will continue to be selectively enforced.

Ari Gold · « **Reply #3 on:** March 19, 2009, 01:11:06 PM »

I personally think that if Gwen Moore can get past Mandatory Sick Day Pay, she has a walk to the final 4 from the MMSD region, however watch out for Tom Barrett's Choo-Choo. They were a late entry to the tournament, and may be very underrated in it's capacity to suck. If CBS 58 can beat Kane, they could come out of the McGee Region, but watch out for Dirty Dining. that is my other cinerella's of suck though Lake FM just has so much suck in it they may be able to run the tables. From the Water Street Region, I think it'll be Bootleggers vs Cover Charges, and thats a really evenly matched game obviously. From the MPS Region, the Bonecrushers are bad, really bad. In Fact they suck, but is there anything worse in Milwaukee than the US Bank Championship?

Also for reference the bubble teams for the Suck Tournament were:
Time Warner Sports
Service at George Webs
The Midwest Express Center
The Milwaukee Theatre

Phi Iota Gamma 84 · « **Reply #4 on:** March 19, 2009, 01:30:45 PM »

Quote from: Ari Gold on March 19, 2009, 01:11:06 PM

I personally think that if Gwen Moore can get past Mandatory Sick Day Pay, she has a walk to the final 4 from the MMSD region, however watch out for Tom Barrett's Choo-Choo. They were a late entry to the tournament, and may be very underrated in it's capacity to suck. If CBS 58 can beat Kane, they could come out of the McGee Region, but watch out for Dirty Dining. that is my other cinerella's of suck though Lake FM just has so much suck in it they may be able to run the tables. From the Water Street Region, I think it'll be Bootleggers vs Cover Charges, and thats a really evenly matched game obviously. From the MPS Region, the Bonecrushers are bad, really bad. In Fact they suck, but is there anything worse in Milwaukee than the US Bank Championship?

Also for reference the bubble teams for the Suck Tournament were:
Time Warner Sports
Service at George Webs
The Midwest Express Center
The Milwaukee Theatre

Charlene Hardin was absolutely jobbed

g0lden3agle · « **Reply #5 on:** March 19, 2009, 02:04:43 PM »

I'm confused, is a 16 seed a favorite over a 1 seed? Why is Rickey's on State a 16 seed?

LON · « **Reply #6 on:** March 19, 2009, 03:08:59 PM »

You could have thrown Encore in there as well...

It gives me douche-chills

Ari Gold · « **Reply #7 on:** March 19, 2009, 03:15:13 PM »

A 1 sucks more than a 16 but we really just wanted strip-club vs strip-club matchup and we feel there is a lot of parity involved in sucking to begin with. The problem with this match up was we didnt know anyone that has actually been to Rickey's and therefore it only exists in theory whereas Scoopers like Travis Deiner's Punching Bag (Miss you

) really know the suck in the multiple Art's lap dances he's been on the reciving end of.

chapman · « **Reply #8 on:** March 19, 2009, 04:21:57 PM »

I'm guessing the disgusting general filthiness and ridiculous amount of garbage littered all over town is kind of like the "trophy" or something.

Ari Gold · « **Reply #9 on:** March 19, 2009, 04:31:02 PM »

Quote from: chapman on March 19, 2009, 04:21:57 PM

I'm guessing the disgusting general filthiness and ridiculous amount of garbage littered all over town is kind of like the "trophy" or something.

The winner gets a free lapdance at Rickey's, free tix to arab world fest, season tix to the bone crushers and mentioned in one of Mark Belling's Rants. Also you're put in charge of helping Gwen Moore make Marquette fully poop powered, which means you'll be on the toilet a lot.

MilWarrior · « **Reply #10 on:** March 19, 2009, 05:17:19 PM »

Pretty decent list. Lived in Milwaukee my whole life and agree with most of them. But 9 PM alcohol sales cut-off should be a 1 seed no doubt. Northworst Airlines has their hub in Detroit but does have a ton of flights in MKE so I see where you're coming from. The Third Ward mention has me scratching my head a bit. Overall pretty good though, I can't think of anything that you really missed. MMSD dumping into Lake Michigan after every rainstorm maybe.

Ari Gold · « **Reply #11 on:** March 19, 2009, 05:37:14 PM »

Quote from: MilWarrior on March 19, 2009, 05:17:19 PM

The Third Ward mention has me scratching my head a bit.

The Third Ward- That overrated chique bar area that wants to be in Chicago.

MMSD (like MPS...) suck so much they got honorary region names

jmayer1 · « **Reply #12 on:** March 19, 2009, 05:46:26 PM »

Quote from: Ari Gold on March 19, 2009, 05:37:14 PM

The Third Ward- That overrated chique bar area that wants to be in Chicago.

yep, cuz Bucktown is sooooo awesome

ZiggysFryBoy · « **Reply #13 on:** March 19, 2009, 08:26:55 PM »

I've been to ricky's and I've been to art's. ricky's is by far worse. my man 4ever would probably disagree though.

MilWarrior · « **Reply #14 on:** March 20, 2009, 04:46:05 AM »

Ok Ari, we all know Milwaukee isn't Chicago. The Third Ward sucks compared to Chicago's chic bar scene. But this is supposed to be a "Tournament of the Suck" for Milwaukee right? The Third Ward used to be the eye sore of Milwaukee. A bunch of unused warehouses and broken down factories. I would think the development and influx of young professionals in the Third Ward would be a positive for Milwaukee.

shaquilvaine · « **Reply #15 on:** March 21, 2009, 07:37:00 AM »

Fantastic list... I'm hearing a lot of complaining from Cudahy. They claim their track record and history is alot more extensive than West Allis. In fact, I believe in certain parts of Cudahy one needs to have evidence of all of their vaccinations just to enter.

rugbydrummer · « **Reply #16 on:** March 21, 2009, 01:57:45 PM »

Quote from: Ari Gold on March 19, 2009, 01:11:06 PM

I personally think that if Gwen Moore can get past Mandatory Sick Day Pay, she has a walk to the final 4 from the MMSD region, however watch out for Tom Barrett's Choo-Choo. They were a late entry to the tournament, and may be very underrated in it's capacity to suck. If CBS 58 can beat Kane, they could come out of the McGee Region, but watch out for Dirty Dining. that is my other cinerella's of suck though Lake FM just has so much suck in it they may be able to run the tables. From the Water Street Region, I think it'll be Bootleggers vs Cover Charges, and thats a really evenly matched game obviously. From the MPS Region, the Bonecrushers are bad, really bad. In Fact they suck, but is there anything worse in Milwaukee than the US Bank Championship?

Also for reference the bubble teams for the Suck Tournament were:
Time Warner Sports
Service at George Webs
The Midwest Express Center
The Milwaukee Theatre

?

Why isn't the milwaukee Iron on that list?

or Wave, for that matter, LOL. or MU men's soccer (sorry guys . . . ) PS I like Casablanca >_<

and what is the ranking based on? is it better or worse to be a #1 on the list of things you don't like about milwaukee? I am hoping it is better to be a #16 in this regard

Ari Gold · « **Reply #17 on:** March 21, 2009, 04:02:32 PM »

1 is most suck. 16 is least suck.

Third Ward is on there because it used to be SUPER bad, but it has improved

I figured out a way to conduct voting so you can look above for that

chapman · « **Reply #18 on:** March 22, 2009, 10:36:20 PM »

Another honorable mention: that old car that drives around going about 10 mph with notes/poster/whatever it's supposed to be plastered all over it and blaring some tape with a guy telling me that I'm going to hell. It's disturbing to look at, disturbing to listen to, and worst of all is if you're trying to drive and get behind it.

Jackson_Downer · « **Reply #19 on:** March 23, 2009, 12:05:00 PM »

Perhaps the Jesus-mobile and Freeway could be the play-in game.

Ari Gold · « **Reply #20 on:** March 23, 2009, 01:56:09 PM »

Quote from: chapman on March 22, 2009, 10:36:20 PM

Another honorable mention: that old car that drives around going about 10 mph with notes/poster/whatever it's supposed to be plastered all over it and blaring some tape with a guy telling me that I'm going to hell. It's disturbing to look at, disturbing to listen to, and worst of all is if you're trying to drive and get behind it.

By no means do I intend to start a political debate, but I've often wondered where that guy falls politically. The overt religiousness should point right, but...

Quote from: Jackson_Downer on March 23, 2009, 12:05:00 PM

Perhaps the Jesus-mobile and Freeway could be the play-in game.

Freeway? no no no one thousand times no. He is a top seed in the Tournament of Milwaukee Greats

SWARM! · « **Reply #21 on:** March 25, 2009, 05:20:48 PM »

Great list - Summerfest and Bastille Day violence/shootings come to mind, but you pretty much have one a long the same lines with the Juneteenth celebration violence.

I second the vote for the incredibly creepy Jesus/Aborted Fetus mobile.

Chili · « **Reply #22 on:** March 25, 2009, 06:30:45 PM »

Quote from: RichardShaw on March 25, 2009, 05:20:48 PM

Great list - Summerfest and Bastille Day violence/shootings come to mind, but you pretty much have one a long the same lines with the Juneteenth celebration violence.

I second the vote for the incredibly creepy Jesus/Aborted Fetus mobile.

really? i would never think of that.

Ari Gold · « **Reply #23 on:** March 26, 2009, 04:14:19 PM »

Quote from: RichardShaw on March 25, 2009, 05:20:48 PM

I second the vote for the incredibly creepy Jesus/Aborted Fetus mobile.

I saw that guy driving today for the first time in awhile. He was blaring an Obama speech. I believe it was either his innagural speech or his November speech. I can't totally remember. -not trying to be political but I had wondered his political orientation, thought others might have too-

NavinRJohnson · « **Reply #24 on:** March 30, 2009, 06:46:39 PM »

I tried to participate. I really did, but I have to nominate the Tournament of the Suck, as a late entry to the Tournament of the Suck (I really don't understand that 'the' BTW).

News:

Recent Posts

Please Register - It's FREE!

Author Topic: First Annual 2009 Milwaukee Tournament of the Suck (Read 7066 times)