Parenting: tips, tricks, stories and more

[iammartino]

Read. Read to them. Have them read to you. Read fiction. Read nonfiction. Talk about the characters. Talk about the characters are feeling. Ask about they are feeling as you read. Read. Read. Read. After 20 years in education, I can point out who was read to pretty quickly...

[JWags85]

Take advantage of kids flying for free under 2. Lots to stress about car seats, checking strollers, etc. Just do it and learn what works for you. There are tons of resources on activities for babies on planes. Also use screen time as a tool to make life easier for you. Take advantage of renting baby gear in just about any vacation destination.

This reminds me...if you're a traveller at all and fly regularly, get a good collapsable stroller.  We were looking at a bigger stroller and then the smaller "travel stroller" but got an Bugaboo that collapses with one hand and fits in an overhead.  No gate checking, no multiple strollers, same fit and situation at home, the airport, at the destination.  Its the best investment we made (not that it was all that expensive).

[Galway Eagle]

This reminds me...if you're a traveller at all and fly regularly, get a good collapsable stroller.  We were looking at a bigger stroller and then the smaller "travel stroller" but got an Bugaboo that collapses with one hand and fits in an overhead.  No gate checking, no multiple strollers, same fit and situation at home, the airport, at the destination.  Its the best investment we made (not that it was all that expensive).

Model? I have to go to Ireland for family stuff in February so looking for a travel stroller for a Christmas gift.

[The Sultan]

I've always thought that if a time machine is ever invented, the most popular trip to take would be to go back in time to when your kids were toddlers and you can pick them up and show them the world again.

Yes.

But you also need to understand that you are going to f*ck up every so often. You will say or do the wrong thing. Your child will get hurt in someway. But don't let that lead to regrets. It's all part of what makes up your family - and that's OK.

[JWags85]

Model? I have to go to Ireland for family stuff in February so looking for a travel stroller for a Christmas gift.

We have a Bugaboo Butterfly.  Little pricier than a standard travel stroller, but like I said, we used it for everything and its the only stroller we have.  Its awesome.

[WarriorFan]

Model? I have to go to Ireland for family stuff in February so looking for a travel stroller for a Christmas gift.

We put about a million miles on our Stokke YoYo.  Our little guy was born dec 2019 and we traveled everywhere despite covid restrictions and that stroller was his bed, his feeding chair, his toy, his walking trainer, and we used it for walking, airports, everything. 

[MU82]

After spending a couple of decades helping to raise two kids to adulthood, and after watching my two kids raise our grandkids for the last 5 years now, I can't stress the importance of setting rules and boundaries ... and sticking to them.

You have to stick to them even if your kid cries and whines and makes life miserable for a few minutes (or a few hours or even a few days).

If you say, "If you push your brother again, no dessert for you tonight," only to let him have dessert anyway despite pushing his brother again (and again) - because you couldn't stand listening to him whine - you will regret it.

Caving in just because your kid whines will offer temporary relief, but it will create years of adverse situations that aren't good for the kids, the parents and the siblings.

Don't make idle threats. If you issue a warning, and that warning goes unheeded, you'd better be ready to follow through on the consequences.

Even good kids - and I'd classify all of my grandkids as very good kids - need guidance and discipline and rules. Choose your battles (for example, don't say "no" to everything), but if you do say "no," you'd better makes sure he or she knows you mean "no."

[StillAWarrior]

Don't make idle threats. If you issue a warning, and that warning goes unheeded, you'd better be ready to follow through on the consequences.

This is so true. If you make a threat -- whether minor (e.g., no desert, go to room, etc.) or more serious (e.g., grounding, loss of privileges, etc.), you need to follow up.

One mother we know well comes to mind. She used to threaten her kids with really extreme punishments over pretty minor things: "If you don't pick up your toys right now you won't get to watch TV for a month." The threats were always disproportionate to what was going on. My wife and I used to joke that all the kids heard was, "If you don't pick up your toys right now, absolutely nothing is going to happen." And it never did. And the results were as you would expect.

Honestly, it's pretty amazing how even relatively minor consequences can work well when a child knows that they will actually follow.

[TAMU, Knower of Ball]

Following through on consequences is important, but equally important is making sure the consequence makes sense for the situation. To use SaW's mom friend as an example, what does picking up toys and not eatching TV for the next month have to do with each other? Nothing. The only lesson learned is "do what mom says or there will be an arbitrary consequence". The problem with that is once the consequence is removed,  theres no incentive to do things the right way.

Instead, the conversation can be "you can't watch TV until you pick up your toys". It puts an obstacle between them and what they want and gives them motivation to do what you ask quickly and to take care of it sooner in the future.

[21Jumpstreet]

Parenting with Love and Logic can be an awesome approach. Give a kid an opportunity to solve an issue or make a good choice. We rarely punished and even sometimes asked our boys what their consequences should be.

[drewm88]

This reminds me...if you're a traveller at all and fly regularly, get a good collapsable stroller.  We were looking at a bigger stroller and then the smaller "travel stroller" but got an Bugaboo that collapses with one hand and fits in an overhead.  No gate checking, no multiple strollers, same fit and situation at home, the airport, at the destination.  Its the best investment we made (not that it was all that expensive).

We borrowed a friend's Mountain Buggy for our first plane trip and immediately bought our own. I eventually had a love/hate relationship with it. In hindsight, I think it would have been better to either just get a cheapo one to gate check (and replace as needed) or splurge on a higher level travel stroller. But it got the job done. Ability to put the infant car seat in it was huge in those early days.

[GB Warrior]

Following through on consequences is important, but equally important is making sure the consequence makes sense for the situation. To use SaW's mom friend as an example, what does picking up toys and not eatching TV for the next month have to do with each other? Nothing. The only lesson learned is "do what mom says or there will be an arbitrary consequence". The problem with that is once the consequence is removed,  theres no incentive to do things the right way.

Instead, the conversation can be "you can't watch TV until you pick up your toys". It puts an obstacle between them and what they want and gives them motivation to do what you ask quickly and to take care of it sooner in the future.

Also kids are terrorists and once they know you won't follow through, your threats are useless

[Skatastrophy]

Also kids are terrorists and once they know you won't follow through, your threats are useless

Kids are terrorists with whatever they can get away with. It's wild.

My friends are 'gentle parenting', and their kids are hilariously evil.