Kermode Bear Spotted in the UP

[MuggsyB]

These are white brown bears that are only found in British Columbia.  A.K.A. the "Spirit Bear".  This is the first time in 20 yrs one has been in the USA, I believe there are fewer than 200 in BC.  I hope this bear is alright and protected by authorities in Michigan. 

[PGsHeroes32]

[Dr. Blackheart]

Bear hunting season just ended but archery upcoming.

[MuggsyB]

Bear hunting season just ended but archery upcoming.

There are no laws to protect this bear in Michigan.  Something has to be done.  I wonder how he/she ended up there?

[tower912]

Western UP.   Probably came through Minnesota and Wisconsin

[MuggsyB]

Western UP.   Probably came through Minnesota and Wisconsin

By himself/herself on a trek?  This is crazy unusual Tower.  He/She needs to be relocated to the Great Bear Rainforest ASAP.

[real chili 83]

Bear tacos.  Nummy

[lawdog77]

Bear tacos.  Nummy

Hey. We don't make fun of Bears here, unless they play football.

[tower912]

Officials want to capture the bear before poachers do.

[ZiggysFryBoy]

Meat summit in Marquette.   Chili is smoking bear.

[pbiflyer]

Hey. We don't make fun of Bears here, unless they play football.

Now that was funny!

[MuggsyB]

Now that was funny!

If actual Bears could be taught how to play football they would never lose.

[rocky_warrior]

Kermode on kamado.  A match made in heaven.

[real chili 83]

https://youtu.be/tHJxe2hfTjc

[CreightonWarrior]

Officials want to capture the bear before poachers do.

Send it to Martha’s Vineyard!

[Hards Alumni]

By himself/herself on a trek?  This is crazy unusual Tower.  He/She needs to be relocated to the Great Bear Rainforest ASAP.

Or maybe he is just fine where he is.

[StillAWarrior]

If actual Bears could be taught how to play football they would never lose.

What if they were black bears and they were playing a team of silverback gorillas who had been taught to play football?

[Uncle Rico]

Send it to Martha’s Vineyard!

A caravan of spirit bears is descending upon the northern border and no one is doing anything!  Where the hell is Tucker?

[tower912]

The bear is white.

[MuggsyB]

What if they were black bears and they were playing a team of silverback gorillas who had been taught to play football?

That's a really tough one.  If they were Polar Bears or Kodiak's they would have an enormous size advantage.  Plus Polar Bears can lift like 1000 lbs.  That said Silverbacks probably could understand the game far more quickly.  Either way I'd take my chances if I replaced NFL lineman on both sides with either of these animals.  Keep in mind Polar Bears can be 11 feet tall and weigh 1800 lbs.  They would maul 300+ NFL players like the average human could a toddler. 

[Uncle Rico]

The bear is white.

Checkmate, libs

[StillAWarrior]

That's a really tough one.  If they were Polar Bears or Kodiak's they would have an enormous size advantage.  Plus Polar Bears can lift like 1000 lbs.  That said Silverbacks probably could understand the game far more quickly.  Either way I'd take my chances if I replaced NFL lineman on both sides with either of these animals.  Keep in mind Polar Bears can be 11 feet tall and weigh 1800 lbs.  They would maul 300+ NFL players like the average human could a toddler. 

There is a reason I specified black bears...

[MuggsyB]

There is a reason I specified black bears...

Fair enough.  That's an extremely difficult question. Let me think about this for a while.....the Silverback could have the edge.

[Uncle Rico]

Fair enough.  That's an extremely difficult question. Let me think about this for a while.....the Silverback could have the edge.

Animals are too stupid to play sports

[MuggsyB]

Animals are too stupid to play sports

They play their own sports and are not stupid. My guess is you have never observed Orangutans and Gorillas. 

[Uncle Rico]

They play their own sports and are not stupid. My guess is you have never observed Orangutans and Gorillas.

When a gorilla or bear can play baseball “The Cardinal Way”, we can talk

[MuggsyB]

When a gorilla or bear can play baseball “The Cardinal Way”, we can talk

Stop disparaging and mocking some of our great species.  Maybe they have no interest in baseball and prefer mma or boxing.

[swoopem]

Stop disparaging and mocking some of our great species.  Maybe they have no interest in baseball and prefer mma or boxing.

Uhh yeah, gorillas hate baseball. They love soccer

[Uncle Rico]

Stop disparaging and mocking some of our great species.  Maybe they have no interest in baseball and prefer mma or boxing.

Sure, if they love having their brains smashed in for our entertainment.

[WhiteTrash]

Actual bears playing football with Ditka as coach.... not even God would have a chance.

[Hards Alumni]

Fair enough.  That's an extremely difficult question. Let me think about this for a while.....the Silverback could have the edge.

It wouldn't be close, the gorilla would annihilate the bear.

[MuggsyB]

It wouldn't be close, the gorilla would annihilate the bear.

That's factually incorrect after looking at some Black Bear facts.  I didn't realize they can go about 650 lbs and run 30 mph. 

[PGsHeroes32]

Black Bears are evil and must be destroyed

[Hards Alumni]

That's factually incorrect after looking at some Black Bear facts.  I didn't realize they can go about 650 lbs and run 30 mph.

Sounds great, they'd still get torn to shreds by a silverback.  Bears are fat and stupid.  Gorillas are all muscle and mean.

It would not be close.  30mph would only help the bear when it is running for its god damn life from the murder machine chasing it.

[Jockey]

There are no laws to protect this bear in Michigan.  Something has to be done.  I wonder how he/she ended up there?

Uber?

[MuggsyB]

Sounds great, they'd still get torn to shreds by a silverback.  Bears are fat and stupid.  Gorillas are all muscle and mean.

It would not be close.  30mph would only help the bear when it is running for its god damn life from the murder machine chasing it.

This is a totally rrational response.  They are not remotely fat or stupid. 

[Herman Cain]

Here is my all animal Football line up
Defense
Defensive Line Grizzly Bears
Linebackers - Silver Back Gorilla
Defensive Backs - cheetah

Offense
Offensive Line- Elephants
Tight End - orangutan
WR- Gazelle
QB - Chimpanzee

Kicker -Zebra

[The Hippie Satan of Hyperbole]

Cmon Herman.  Gazelles aint catching a football unless it gets wedged in their horns somehow.

[cheebs09]

This is a totally rrational response.  They are not remotely fat or stupid.

I believe the term is “doughy” per Seth Davis.

[Jockey]

This is a totally rrational response.  They are not remotely fat or stupid.

They literally eat as much as they can in late summer and fall to get as fat as possible.

[PBRme]

Or maybe he is just fine where he is.

Or not
https://nypost.com/2022/09/22/michigan-black-bear-with-white-fur-in-is-killed-by-wolves-shortly-after-sighting/

[MU82]

Or not
https://nypost.com/2022/09/22/michigan-black-bear-with-white-fur-in-is-killed-by-wolves-shortly-after-sighting/

Was it really wolves? Sources say Leo DiCaprio was in the area.

[swoopem]

I’m a Michigan resident and had no idea we have wolves. I knew bears were common but didn’t know about wolves. Good thing I never go to the UP

[The Hippie Satan of Hyperbole]

I’m a Michigan resident and had no idea we have wolves. I knew bears were common but didn’t know about wolves. Good thing I never go to the UP

Yeah there are wolves in northern Wisconsin too. Honestly, I am sad that the bear met his fate that way.

[lawdog77]

I’m a Michigan resident and had no idea we have wolves. I knew bears were common but didn’t know about wolves. Good thing I never go to the UP

Wolves by state:
https://nywolf.org/learn/u-s-wolf-populations/

I think MU82 brought some from the midwest to NC

[Uncle Rico]

Here is my all animal Football line up
Defense
Defensive Line Grizzly Bears
Linebackers - Silver Back Gorilla
Defensive Backs - cheetah

Offense
Offensive Line- Elephants
Tight End - orangutan
WR- Gazelle
QB - Chimpanzee

Kicker -Zebra

A pee wee team would beat them by 100 because animals can’t play team sports

[The Hippie Satan of Hyperbole]

A pee wee team would beat them by 100 because animals can’t play team sports

Yeah the animals would probably jump offsides a lot.  OTOH, they would likely eat the pee wee team before they could accomplish much.

[Uncle Rico]

Yeah the animals would probably jump offsides a lot.  OTOH, they would likely eat the pee wee team before they could accomplish much.

Then they’d be disqualified and the win awarded to the kids.  Animals are too stupid to know the rules

[swoopem]

Wolves by state:
https://nywolf.org/learn/u-s-wolf-populations/

I think MU82 brought some from the midwest to NC

Wow, Minnesota with the second most. I would’ve bet big that Montana, Wyoming, Idaho, and even Colorado had more

Also, I wonder how many wolves it took to take down the bear. I’d think the bear could put up a good fight.

[The Hippie Satan of Hyperbole]

Yeah I guess a posthumous win is still a win.

[TAMU, Knower of Ball]

Was it really wolves? Sources say Leo DiCaprio was in the area.

My money is on Shia LeBouf

[tower912]

Well, crap.   Circle of life and all, but still, crap.

[MU82]

Wolves by state:
https://nywolf.org/learn/u-s-wolf-populations/

I think MU82 brought some from the midwest to NC

Only 10 red wolves here.

Used to be 12, but I had this great wolf stew recipe.

[StillAWarrior]

Was it really wolves? Sources say Leo DiCaprio was in the area.

I'd like to know if they checked the area for Silverbacks. They'd to anything for an edge in the big game.

[MuggsyB]

I’m a Michigan resident and had no idea we have wolves. I knew bears were common but didn’t know about wolves. Good thing I never go to the UP

There needs to be an investigation.  Very upsetting.

[The Hippie Satan of Hyperbole]

I'd like to know if they checked the area for Silverbacks. They'd to anything for an edge in the big game.

Silverback...yooper.

Potato...potahto.

[rocky_warrior]

Or not
https://nypost.com/2022/09/22/michigan-black-bear-with-white-fur-in-is-killed-by-wolves-shortly-after-sighting/

"“Our wolf population has devastated our big game populations in the U.P.,” Yooper Outdoors #906 wrote in a Facebook chat."

From lawdogs link:  695 gray wolves in MI.

From original link: "Michigan’s population of 10,050 bears"

Sounds pretty desperate for the bears 

[The Hippie Satan of Hyperbole]

"“Our wolf population has devastated our big game populations in the U.P.,” Yooper Outdoors #906 wrote in a Facebook chat."

From lawdogs link:  695 gray wolves in MI.

From original link: "Michigan’s population of 10,050 bears"

Sounds pretty desperate for the bears 

Yeah, hunters have a pretty healthy distaste for wolves.

[Hards Alumni]

This is a totally rrational response.  They are not remotely fat or stupid.

The gorilla would win.  Arrange this meeting, and give me favorable odds.

[Hards Alumni]

Wow, Minnesota with the second most. I would’ve bet big that Montana, Wyoming, Idaho, and even Colorado had more

Also, I wonder how many wolves it took to take down the bear. I’d think the bear could put up a good fight.

3 I bet

[Hards Alumni]

There needs to be an investigation.  Very upsetting.

Imagine all the animals that die every day in nature.

This was one.

[Hards Alumni]

"“Our wolf population has devastated our big game populations in the U.P.,” Yooper Outdoors #906 wrote in a Facebook chat."

From lawdogs link:  695 gray wolves in MI.

From original link: "Michigan’s population of 10,050 bears"

Sounds pretty desperate for the bears 

Need more wolves, less deer.

[Hards Alumni]

Rules for bear interactions:

If it's black, fight back
If it's brown lay down
If it's white, say good night

So, humans should fight black bears.  No human would dare challenge a gorilla.

[TAMU, Knower of Ball]

No human would dare challenge a gorilla.

Never underestimate human stupidity

[Hards Alumni]

Never underestimate human stupidity

Very true, RIP Harambe.

The gorilla that ended the world.

Dicks out.

[tower912]

Can change the name to commode bear now.

[CreightonWarrior]

Or not
https://nypost.com/2022/09/22/michigan-black-bear-with-white-fur-in-is-killed-by-wolves-shortly-after-sighting/

Nature!

[Uncle Rico]

Nature!

If that bear was any smart, it would have avoided the wolves.  Further proof, animals are dumb

[StillAWarrior]

If that bear was any smart, it would have avoided the wolves.  Further proof, animals are dumb

Personally, I'm in favor of NFL/NBA interleague games, but there are matchups I'd rather see than Bears vs. Timberwolves.

[TSmith34, Inc.]

The bear is white.

Thread Winner

[TSmith34, Inc.]

Or not
https://nypost.com/2022/09/22/michigan-black-bear-with-white-fur-in-is-killed-by-wolves-shortly-after-sighting/

Holy crape, this is very Underworld

[Scoop Snoop]

I have quite a few vertical scratch marks at the tops of the doors (where they meet the roof) of my Highlander that are obviously from a bear who tried to peel the window frames open like a can of sardines. This is thanks to stupid humans who leave food in vehicles in bear country which encourages bears to try their luck in more vehicles. Today's vehicles' window frame to roofline spacing makes it difficult for the bear to get a grip but not that many years ago, it was easy for bears to get in. I remember seeing a video of a many cars in a parking lot in a national park with the frames bent out, looking like a birds' wings.

Some scratches on my old SUV would be no big deal, but it was parked right next to our home. 

[MuggsyB]

Here is my all animal Football line up
Defense
Defensive Line Grizzly Bears
Linebackers - Silver Back Gorilla
Defensive Backs - cheetah

Offense
Offensive Line- Elephants
Tight End - orangutan
WR- Gazelle
QB - Chimpanzee

Kicker -Zebra

Did you forget about the rhinos and giraffes Herman?

[real chili 83]

Bears are crafty.

On Kabetogema fishing.  Shore lunch on Cutover Island, on the campground elevated 100 ft or so over the place we beached the boats.

Yogi and Boo-boo show up, 30 yards from our pickinic tables, watching us eat (mama bear and two cubs).

We finish lunch and go back to the boats to find the boats were ransacked. Yogi and Boo-boo were decoys.

Weird, one guy had Cuban cigars, they were gone.

[Scoop Snoop]

Bears are crafty.

On Kabetogema fishing.  Shore lunch on Cutover Island, on the campground elevated 100 ft or so over the place we beached the boats.

Yogi and Boo-boo show up, 30 yards from our pickinic tables, watching us eat (mama bear and two cubs).

We finish lunch and go back to the boats to find the boats were ransacked. Yogi and Boo-boo were decoys.

Weird, one guy had Cuban cigars, they were gone.

Great story, and yes-bears are crafty. A beekeeper near me got a call from a man who allowed the beekeeper to set up a couple of hives on his property. Bears were raiding the hives, so the beekeeper quickly drove to the property to run them off with pellet guns and bear spray. While there, he gets a frantic call from his wife telling him that bears hit the mother lode of hives on his own property. The first raid was a diversionary one! Those bears probably wished they had Cuban cigars to celebrate their big victory.

I would have been very nervous with Mama bear and her cubs near my picnic table. Mamas are often notoriously paranoid when they have cubs and can be really dangerous.

[MuggsyB]

Great story, and yes-bears are crafty. A beekeeper near me got a call from a man who allowed the beekeeper to set up a couple of hives on his property. Bears were raiding the hives, so the beekeeper quickly drove to the property to run them off with pellet guns and bear spray. While there, he gets a frantic call from his wife telling him that bears hit the mother lode of hives on his own property. The first raid was a diversionary one! Those bears probably wished they had Cuban cigars to celebrate their big victory.

I would have been very nervous with Mama bear and her cubs near my picnic table. Mamas are often notoriously paranoid when they have cubs and can be really dangerous.

Bears are much.much, smarter than some are suggesting here. And you're correct Scoop Snoop: Don't trifle with a Mama Bear and her cubs. I enjoy the videos where they hop fences and swim in human pools as a family. 

[PGsHeroes32]

Bears are imbeciles.

Gorillas would gronk smash them to death.

[wadesworld]

https://www.google.com/amp/s/outsider.com/outdoors/grizzly-bear-ferociously-protects-kill-while-tourists-watch-yellowstone-national-park/amp/

I was in Yellowstone the day this happened. There was a massive traffic jam. We parked and tried to walk to whatever was causing it, but there was no end in sight so we went back to the car. On our way back people would ask us “what’s up there?” We told them we hadn’t got up to it and then joked that we should’ve told them a grizzly was fighting a bison. We joked about how it’s probably just a bison in a field, because every time there was a traffic jam that’s what it seemed to be. We started driving back towards it and heard someone answer a person in front of us that a grizzly had killed a bull elk. So then we knew we had to stop. The three passengers got out and as we got up to where the crowd was across the river there was a spot open right next to a ranger’s car. Felt like there must’ve been a reason nobody was taking the spot, but I pulled in anyway.

Most of the time we were there the bear was just sleeping near the half buried hill elk. We started to leave and it started moving around a bit, so we stopped to watch. A ranger was right there so she told us all about how it happened and all about the bear. She said he’d probably continue to rest for another day but if we stopped back the next day we might see it more active. We came back the next day and it still hadn’t bit into its catch and was still just sleeping. It was on like national news because apparently grizzlies will typically eat as much as it can and then get away and wolves and other bears come in and eat what’s left. But this guy was eating some, burying the rest, and fighting off other bears and wolves. They said it was very unusual behavior.

[Hards Alumni]

Bears are imbeciles.

Gorillas would gronk smash them to death.

Preach.  Black bears are cowardly dumb beasts.