POSITIVES
1. Shorter than Danny Manning
2. Not Christian Laettner
3. Bigger mouth than Coach K. Seriously, take a look at Coach K's mouth. Tiny, like a mouse.
4. Definitely more physically attractive than Brett Williams (ie. Does not look like a cross between phallic symbol with a nice sweaty on and Curly).
5. If sick and bedridden, Bobby Hurley, J.J. Reddick, and/or Danny Ferry can fill in and we won't even notice a difference.
NEGATIVES
1. Difficult to pronounce name
2. How do you spell Wojohousekey?
3. First real job out of school. #lifelongintern
4. Needs extra tall ladder to cut down nets
5. Jeff Capel moves one seat closer to Coach K; a seat Wojo has kept warm for nearly two decades.
MU got the biggest name in assistant coaching. Seriously, can you have a longer name?