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Author Topic: Irony defined  (Read 3284 times)

tower912

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Irony defined
« on: January 28, 2010, 09:44:33 AM »
On Tuesday, after another local shooting by a teenager, I lectured my freshman daughter about the dangers of guns, why if they are kept in the home, they must be kept away from children, how you should only have one if you get the proper training,  why I choose to not have one, etc.     On Wednesday, she gets asked out for the first time.     sonuva..........
Luke 6:45   ...A good man produces goodness from the good in his heart; an evil man produces evil out of his store of evil.   Each man speaks from his heart's abundance...

It is better to be fearless and cheerful than cheerless and fearful.

muhoosier260

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #1 on: January 28, 2010, 10:55:52 AM »
Hahahah, good luck dad

StillAWarrior

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #2 on: January 28, 2010, 11:55:55 AM »
On Tuesday, after another local shooting by a teenager, I lectured my freshman daughter about the dangers of guns, why if they are kept in the home, they must be kept away from children, how you should only have one if you get the proper training,  why I choose to not have one, etc.     On Wednesday, she gets asked out for the first time.     sonuva..........

Keep in mind that you don't need to actually buy any ammo.  Just have the gun so that when boys come to pick her up, they see you cleaning the gun.  You'll be much less likely to have an accidental shooting.  On the other hand, if you ever do "need" to use it, it'll be a lot easier for them to prove premeditation when you have to go out and buy ammo on the way to the boy's house.

That's my plan, anyway, when my three daughters get a little older.
Never wrestle with a pig.  You both get dirty, and the pig likes it.

Sir Lawrence

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2010, 12:36:00 PM »
I have three daughters and one son.  House rule for the daughters was that their date was required to come to the door to meet mom and dad, and then they could take little whomever out.  In other words, no honking in the driveway and running out to the car.  My spouse and I never really formulated an answer to the inevitable question "why does Jimmy have to do that, you already know Jimmy" other than "it's the polite thing to do."

One late spring evening daughter #2, (I think she was then a senior in high school) was getting picked up by a young man who honked.  I looked at her and said, go to the door, and wave idiot boy into the house.  She does so, and he honks again.  Now she is upset with me for not letting her go out the door.  Her cell phone rings, and it's Mr. Wonderful.  She says, come on in for 30 seconds, meet the old man, and we are out of here.  He says no, come on out.  Now I'm really annoyed, so to the utter horror and embarrassment of my daughter, I walk down the front walk, tap on the drivers door, with a smile on my face, and was about to politely ask him to come on in and meet my spouse, when the little dill weed puts the car in gear and speeds off.  My jaw nearly dropped to the pavement, as I didn't see that coming at all. 

Now my daughter is in tears, and in her eyes I'm the biggest ash hole that ever lived.  To make this already too long story shorter, turns out the little punk was stoned out his gourd and that's why he obviously didn't want to meet and greet the old man.  Subsequently, he ran afoul of several statutory mandates and apparently has spent some time in confinement.  Moral of the story?  It's OK to be an ash hole when you are a parent. 
Ludum habemus.

StillAWarrior

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #4 on: January 28, 2010, 12:55:23 PM »
I have three daughters and one son.

Me too.  Glad to hear you survived it.

Great story.
Never wrestle with a pig.  You both get dirty, and the pig likes it.

Skatastrophy

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #5 on: January 28, 2010, 01:10:27 PM »
On Tuesday, after another local shooting by a teenager, I lectured my freshman daughter about the dangers of guns, why if they are kept in the home, they must be kept away from children, how you should only have one if you get the proper training,  why I choose to not have one, etc.     On Wednesday, she gets asked out for the first time.     sonuva..........

You don't need guns when you can pretend you just got out of prison for strangling your daughter's last suitor to death.  And they never successfully prosecuted you for those other suspicious deaths at your daughters last school...

rocky_warrior

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #6 on: January 28, 2010, 01:12:42 PM »
the little dill weed puts the car in gear and speeds off.  My jaw nearly dropped to the pavement, as I didn't see that coming at all. 

Sorry about that - I thought you were the cops  :D

GGGG

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #7 on: January 28, 2010, 01:20:41 PM »
I have three daughters and one son.  House rule for the daughters was that their date was required to come to the door to meet mom and dad, and then they could take little whomever out.  In other words, no honking in the driveway and running out to the car.  My spouse and I never really formulated an answer to the inevitable question "why does Jimmy have to do that, you already know Jimmy" other than "it's the polite thing to do."


Funny...my son is going to a concert this weekend with a fair lady.  She's driving but first she has to come in to say hello.

4everwarriors

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #8 on: January 28, 2010, 01:43:39 PM »
You don't need a gun in the house unless you're planning on a shotgun wedding. ;D
"Give 'Em Hell, Al"

wildbill sb

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #9 on: January 28, 2010, 02:06:21 PM »
I have three daughters and one son.  House rule for the daughters was that their date was required to come to the door to meet mom and dad, and then they could take little whomever out.  In other words, no honking in the driveway and running out to the car.  My spouse and I never really formulated an answer to the inevitable question "why does Jimmy have to do that, you already know Jimmy" other than "it's the polite thing to do."

One late spring evening daughter #2, (I think she was then a senior in high school) was getting picked up by a young man who honked.  I looked at her and said, go to the door, and wave idiot boy into the house.  She does so, and he honks again.  Now she is upset with me for not letting her go out the door.  Her cell phone rings, and it's Mr. Wonderful.  She says, come on in for 30 seconds, meet the old man, and we are out of here.  He says no, come on out.  Now I'm really annoyed, so to the utter horror and embarrassment of my daughter, I walk down the front walk, tap on the drivers door, with a smile on my face, and was about to politely ask him to come on in and meet my spouse, when the little dill weed puts the car in gear and speeds off.  My jaw nearly dropped to the pavement, as I didn't see that coming at all. 

Now my daughter is in tears, and in her eyes I'm the biggest ash hole that ever lived.  To make this already too long story shorter, turns out the little punk was stoned out his gourd and that's why he obviously didn't want to meet and greet the old man.  Subsequently, he ran afoul of several statutory mandates and apparently has spent some time in confinement.  Moral of the story?  It's OK to be an ash hole when you are a parent. 
Good for you, dad.  Great Story, well-told!  Happy ending, i"m sure.
“I’m working as hard as I can to get my life and my cash to run out at the same time. If I can just die after lunch Tuesday, everything will be perfect.”  - Doug Sanders, professional golfer

ZiggysFryBoy

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #10 on: January 28, 2010, 02:13:31 PM »
Its stories like these that make me glad I only have boys.

RawdogDX

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #11 on: January 28, 2010, 04:06:17 PM »
I have three daughters and one son.  House rule for the daughters was that their date was required to come to the door to meet mom and dad, and then they could take little whomever out.  In other words, no honking in the driveway and running out to the car.  My spouse and I never really formulated an answer to the inevitable question "why does Jimmy have to do that, you already know Jimmy" other than "it's the polite thing to do."
 

So is there a time frame on this?  Is it only the first date?  Or are their guys you've met a few dozen times who still have to come in every time? 

ZiggysFryBoy

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #12 on: January 28, 2010, 04:08:00 PM »
So is there a time frame on this?  Is it only the first date?  Or are their guys you've met a few dozen times who still have to come in every time? 

Rawdog likes em young.   ;D

Brewtown Andy

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #13 on: January 28, 2010, 04:42:32 PM »
I have three daughters and one son.  House rule for the daughters was that their date was required to come to the door to meet mom and dad, and then they could take little whomever out.  In other words, no honking in the driveway and running out to the car.  My spouse and I never really formulated an answer to the inevitable question "why does Jimmy have to do that, you already know Jimmy" other than "it's the polite thing to do."

One late spring evening daughter #2, (I think she was then a senior in high school) was getting picked up by a young man who honked.  I looked at her and said, go to the door, and wave idiot boy into the house.  She does so, and he honks again.  Now she is upset with me for not letting her go out the door.  Her cell phone rings, and it's Mr. Wonderful.  She says, come on in for 30 seconds, meet the old man, and we are out of here.  He says no, come on out.  Now I'm really annoyed, so to the utter horror and embarrassment of my daughter, I walk down the front walk, tap on the drivers door, with a smile on my face, and was about to politely ask him to come on in and meet my spouse, when the little dill weed puts the car in gear and speeds off.  My jaw nearly dropped to the pavement, as I didn't see that coming at all. 

Now my daughter is in tears, and in her eyes I'm the biggest ash hole that ever lived.  To make this already too long story shorter, turns out the little punk was stoned out his gourd and that's why he obviously didn't want to meet and greet the old man.  Subsequently, he ran afoul of several statutory mandates and apparently has spent some time in confinement.  Moral of the story?  It's OK to be an ash hole when you are a parent. 

I only hope to have an interaction with a future boyfriend half as awesome as that.
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Brewtown Andy

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Re: Irony defined
« Reply #14 on: January 28, 2010, 04:43:39 PM »
So is there a time frame on this?  Is it only the first date?  Or are their guys you've met a few dozen times who still have to come in every time? 

As Livia Soprano once said, "Pimps beep."
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